What had happened was...

So I woke up from my slumber while my sexy wife laid still, ignoring the fact that I had to work at 8 am. So as I panicked, she asked me, "what's wrong" and I said that it's 8:06 am. She then said, "Wanna cuddle?" and obviously I accepted her invitation to cuddle. 

Then I received some orb from a fairy, who said that I only had 5 days to transfer it to Mt. Solaur. The location is, unfortunately, 5 days away. So I packed my belongings and ventured off to this perilous journey. My wife warned me not to go, but me being the badass that I am just gave her a kiss and said "I will be back when the sun caresses the horizon." The fairy failed to tell me that Mt. Solaur wasn't a mountain but a fucking statue of a dragon. So I transferred the orb to the dragon and with the new energy, it came to life and flew off to fight the nethercorns (unicorns from hell) for the epic battle for earth. Explosions happened and caused a slashed tire to my car. 

And that's why I'm 20 minutes late ma'am.